In between both houses, now, and my main desktop is in one, my laptop follows me back and forth to work. My desk is a lap tray on the air mattress.
But, in spite of my radio silence, shit has been taking off.
I moved back into Atlantic Highlands, well, you know, the business. I'm at 68 1st Ave, now instead of 76. It's my own place, and I pay rent and everything...and I'm sustaining it. I'll write more about it, but the longer I do it, the better I'm getting. I feel my web reaching and touching people that need the kind of wisdom the cards offer. It's happening. When I think of my "job" I feel suffused with a warm golden light, that just warms me, and I hope others around me, like the sun on a June morning. Of course I'm barely turning a profit. It sustains itself, and gives me a little monetary validation that I'm on the right track. It feels good, it feels correct.
I'm finding, though, sort of a collateral thing that's happening being an established tarot card reader, more spiritual people are seeking me out, and I am really engaging with people on a magickal level. I met a really cool woman at a party on Saturday, and within like the first hour we were talking about past life regression, and hypnotism, and how I do that through the cards. As we were leaving the party, I was like "I meet the COOLEST people" and my mom was like "wow, she was a flake." I looked at her and said, "yeah, that's what they say about people like us." Like attracts like, I guess. But what's happening is, as I meet people and become closer friends, I find us all talking about...Ain Soph Aur, and past lives, the collective unconscious, true will, higher purpose, all that. I'm finding cool people hanging around the shop, and me grabbing books and showing my friends things...and my friends going out and buying books and showing me things...
Um, don't look now, but it feels like a garage band version of a "coven". In fact, my most devoted magical chum (besides Luiz) would cringe and rebel like fuck at that term. She's not a joiner. Neither am I. I have always skipped past the group magic stuff in the books. But, we're not joiners together. And, there are kind of a bunch of us 'non joiners' and we find ourselves sitting around my table, late into the night drinking wine and discussing the stars.
Since Hurricane Sandy, everything in my life has been dulled, repressed, shelved,and sidelined, except tarot. Except magick. And now that we're going home and I feel finally able to flourish, it's all coming together. I've started ritual magick again. My first summoning in ages, literal ages.
A friend of mine, a dyed in the wool atheist, who I've read cards for dozens of times, he asked if it was real. I was like, "look dude. I make money being a witch. I'm a witch, and I sit in my shop all day being witch and doing witchy things, and there are even wands and potions and shit....and I make a living at it. Witches don't exist, we're supposed to be fairy tale villains or a fantasy trope, and here I am buying groceries and repairing my roof with straight up witch money. I don't have hours, I wake up whenever I want, I stay up till dawn, I have told customers to fuck off, I dress how I like, and come and go as I please...I do fucking party tricks with cards, and I have managed to make a career of it. Now, you tell me if it's real."